Many ask me how I write regularly. Yes, do you have this burden that sometimes you may hurt the emotions of people? Absolutely, there is that concern that anything you write will make some people happy and some unhappy. Nonetheless, my focus is to think strategically to make sure I am not disappointing the “right readers”. Yes, I am fine if I occasionally disappoint the “wrong readers”.
I am very aware that if I write and make 100% of readers happy, I am not writing, since a 100% batting percentage is not a possibility. So, the focus is how to make sure the right readers are not disappointed since, partly, they are the reasons you write.
Having that self-assessment brings calm to me since by default, I do not desire for all my posts to be accepted by all. The struggle comes to many because they are writing for everyone to like what they write; that is a dangerous expectation.
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Just answering “Ndubuisi” activates verbal attacks on any political post, irrespective of the content. But knowing that most of those attacks are coming from the wrong readers, you do not even notice.
A great liberation in life comes when you own your space and determine how others could influence you. If you do allow default settings, you may be in trouble. I recommend you finetune those default settings so that when the wrong readers do their jobs, those are already calibrated out in your emotional processing system!
Emotional intelligence is the ability of a person to manage his emotions and that of people around him. It involves being able to control your feelings at dire moments. A person is said to be emotionally intelligent if he doesn’t lose his temper at the slightest provocation. Hence, people that lack emotional intelligence are those that pick offences easily and waste no time to react.
The importance of emotional intelligence is too great to be enumerated. Its benefits can never be over-emphasised. People that have mastered this skill have been able to prevent harming themselves and those close to them. The skill is needed by everyone irrespective of who they are or what they do. Some people think that it is not necessary to develop this skill because “if you don’t say ‘I am’, nobody will say ‘you are’”. They believe that tolerating ‘nonsense’ leads to more ‘nonsense’. So they lash out immediately at people that trigger them. But what people with this kind of mindset fail to understand is that exhibiting violence never pays. Instead of this sort of attitude attracting respect for the person, it attracts hate and loneliness.
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You do not apologise for excellence, and there is no honour in second guessing truths. What is noble about promoting teachings that confuse development? That’s not what great humans are known for.
The reference is and should always be to advance what is pure; what is true; never to violate reason; and to promote development. It is not to win accolades and admiration of those who do not value reason, nor do they give priority to development of humans.
Freedom is fundamental to development, so if you cannot freely tell your truths for the fear of those who might be rattled as a result of their inability to handle them, then you are not living your own life.
Truth must be found, proclaimed, and recognized, no greater assignment than this.
Be still.